Cracked, Not Broken

This blog notwithstanding, I am a relatively private person. Things good and bad are filtered before being shared, if shared at all. The odd person here or there but in general, I manage my stuff myself, with a stiff upper lip and an action plan. Oh, and sometimes unlimited amounts of Miss Vicki's original chips, chocolate, lattes and McDonald's cheeseburgers.
Recently things happened though that affected me deeply and were bigger than I can handle. My reserve well ran dry. Rock bottom. Empty. Zip, nada, nothing.
Breaking my own oversharing rule, I told two friends. They listened, they hugged me, they laughed, they cried, they bought the t-shirt. Amazingly, I felt not only mentally but physically lighter. A shared burden is far less heavy. So I shared with a few more friends.
My heart softened and evolved into a beautiful origami of light. My circle of family, friends and colleagues gently coaxed it open. Love rushed in as tension, frustration and sadness poured out. I mean there were serious puddles of oozing greyness everywhere.
Inside, I was luminous, light and at peace.
"There is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in."(Leonard Cohen, Anthem, The Future, 1992)
I guess my everything finally cracked. Oddly, I don't feel broken or shattered. I feel whole and surrounded by light, inside and out, filtered through beautiful stained glass panes created by my loving circle.
Thank you for being my light, for the support, understanding, friendship, patience and acceptance.
My heart overflows.

April Musings

April is here! The snow is melting, the birds are returning and our hearts (as well as our days!) are lighter. Spring has sprung...
I love this time of year. It holds such potential, such promise. All things are new again, second chances to bloom, life renews and we flourish.
Winter coats are packed away, boots discarded and winter tires replaced with lighter treads. Lawns are raked, weeds removed and seeds planted.
For me, September has always been a month of new starts - probably hearkening back to school days as a kid. April, though, is our true re-birthing, a time to take stock, prune, and plan.
Every New Moon, we review and discard what doesn't serve us, set intentions and make an action plan. Each Full Moon, we celebrate victories, remove loose ends and adjust our course where necessary.
Our New Moon in April serves a dual purpose because in our Hemisphere, the Earth is also readying itself for growth, for change and for renewal.
This is a wonderful time to take stock of what works, what doesn't, what is in your garden, and what you want to add.
Reflect, restore, renew and rejoice.